Thursday, June 16, 2005
CSI: Cuban Sandwich Investigation
While in Tampa, Foodgoat partook of a local favorite, the Cuban specialty. Since I was not able to partake myself, this will have to be a forensic analysis.
-The subject seems to have been squashed by some sort of heavy, blunt (possibly hot) object. Very promising.
-Bread appears soft and sauce-absorbant on the inside, crisp on the outside. Seems adequately thick for maintaining structural integrity.
-Sliced onions appear to be yellow or white. Red onions are typically preferred, but impact here is inconclusive.
-Unclear as to type of meat present. Salami is likely, based on flat circular shape, but this investigator's training in cured meats is limited.
-Presence of several black olives indicative of a serious problem for this investigator, though other investigators may contradict that assessment.
-Presence of at least two (probably more) pickle slices also problematic, as they require delicate removal.
Conclusion: Uncertain. The bread and the characteristic squashing are very suggestive, but there are olives present. In addition, there are no obvious cheeses nor bacon, one or the other of which are usually required for official categorization as Tasty Sandwich.
EDITED TO ADD information from an eyewitness at the scene: the Cuban sandwich was made at, and purchased from, an unconventional source, namely, a gas station. An Exxon gas station of questionable quality. Fortunately, the eyewitness and sandwich consumer suffered no ill effects.